7 Comments
Jan 13, 2022Liked by Amanda Montei

Well, that about breaks the Internet for me!!! I’ll go lie down now! Hot!! Damn! Amanda! Now come help pick up the Internet pieces (so the deep-fried mother perma-masked woman in the back says!!). Ya reckon? You pull back society’s (and Hollywood’s) big green sparkly over-scaled curtain only to nail it and it’s giant invisible folds to the cross to show us at home the lives we lead and to show all the people of Oz that it’s just a wee forgotten professor pulling his plastic levers and, at all-too-real, on the back of Munchkin Moms. Now, I’ll have to send a gift subscriptions to my therapist(s!!!), mother, 2 sisters and 60 nieces!!! Nephews!!! Distant cousins twice removed!!! Wish I knew Oprah! Excellent read***** ps about Lost Daughter, I’ve been both dying to watch it and vomit-afraid! But it’s part of the mom-phoenix-reframe-curriculum! Agh! Only to find out I’m not smarter than this! Look Mom! Come see our pictures from our vacation! I’ve been reframed!

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Wow. You hit it all on the head here. I can’t even pick my favorite lines there were so many. I haven’t watched the lost daughter yet, am planning to watch it with a fellow mom next week after drop off (masked and tested of course!). I love that “bad moms” are having a moment right now (am reading the school for good mothers) because I think we need more portraits of motherhood that illuminates the complicated nature of what we sacrifice, that striving for self, this reaching of limits, that claiming of maternal finitude. Even Merrit Tierce’s beautiful piece on abortion did this. Thank you for this honest writing. My favorite post of yours yet.

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founding
Jan 15, 2022Liked by Amanda Montei

I loved the experience of watching this movie so much. The moments before the "end of the rope" in particular (the denial of the kiss of the cut, gah!) were so intensely physical because they evoked my own daily and embodied experience of "keeping it together." I had to pause the film multiple times, yell at the characters, tear up a bit, etc... It felt like watching the most intellectual and beautiful horror film; yet here the violence isn't sensationalized, but rather reflects our deepest social wounds. The film was quite healing too- I could hear the shattering of the cultural binary between good and bad mothering. These kinds of complex, humble, and realistic representations are just what we need! The pure joy that she felt in the embrace of her children was also so realistic and tender. I kept hearing echoes from our recent writing class and I knew you would add to the brilliant conversation around this film. Thank you for sharing your story and centering the body in your reading of this film!

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This was such a good and profound read. I’m a mother to three young adults, one a severely disabled daughter who lives with me. The caregiving and grappling with identity never leaves.

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deletedJan 19, 2022Liked by Amanda Montei
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